examples?
Lol, just kidding- please don't
I'll give you a couple of short funny ones from federal district court in Miami...
Lawyer is badgering me on the stand with accusations of everything from shooting his client, beating him, setting him on fire etc...even asked how many bullets were in my gun prior to the arrest and afterward. Finally, finishes up with asking whether a "drug dog" was on the scene. I told him there was.
He asked me "what did the dog tell you?"...having had enough of him I kept a deadpan face and said "I didn't talk to the dog, he didn't tell me anything".
Judge cracked up. Jury cracked up. Audience cracked up. I turned to the judge and apologized for being flippant. She said "No, no...he had it coming."
Had another one, desperate to find anything, sum up his cross examination of me by asking me..."Special Agent, knowing what you know now, is there any doubt in your mind as to the guilt of my client?". I looked at the judge, thinking I was walking into a trap for a mistrial, and asked if I could answer the question. He said go ahead. My reply was..."Knowing what I know now, there isn't the slightest doubt in my mind that your client is guilty." His reply? "I have no further questions for the witness."
Jury was out about 15 minutes.
There, I kept it mercifully short for you, Lorien. (I've got plenty more. LOL.)